Saturday, January 02, 2010

Lines That Didn't Make The Radio Show

Just found some lines that didn't make it into the radio series - read them and guess why...

You know we’re in a recession when:

Sharon Osborne’s run out of hair dye

You spot Prince Charles on deal or no deal

Walkers bring out potato flavoured crisps

Easyjet start charging for lifejackets

Angelina Jolie stops adopting kids

4 poofs and a piano become 1 poof and a banjo

You know you’ve got no money when:

You visit your parents and still take your washing, and you’re 55

You get a ball of string and cotton wool buds to make your own tampons

You start going to church, just to get some wine and wafers

You go to the doctors just to nick the samples from the magazines

You have loyalty cards for Asda, Primark and Poundstretcher

Music
Why do heavy metal fans dress like they do?
And why do rap fans dress like rappers?
Why do people dress like the music you like?
It's a problem for me because my mum likes Christina Augulera … And my dad likes Beyonce.

And whats this thing with kids hiking down their jeans and showing you their pants?
When I was a kid you’d only see my pants if you gave me a kitkat.
Don’t judge me, I know some girls who did it for a finger of fudge.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Easyjet start charging for lifejackets => Easyjet still supply lifejackets, but there is an extra charge for the fast track inflation service.

You visit your parents and still take your washing, and you’re 55 =>You only visit your parents to take your washing, and you’re 55

You start going to church, just to get some wine and wafers => Taking communion is your only weekend wine-drinking binge.

Anonymous said...

I think the wine and wafers one WAS in the show...